Guest blog written by Kelly Bird.
I surprised my husband this past weekend with a party for his birthday. Lots of friends, delicious food and...cake! The weather was beautiful, we chatted and played yard games. He was very surprised I could pull it off without him finding out...and so was I!
With our first child on the way, I try my best to exercise, eat well, take my vitamins, rest and laugh everyday. I am committed to doing whatever is in my power to ensure our baby is healthy and growing.
After the party, We took stock of what we had left over. I noticed we had cake—it was a rich and delicious dark chocolate cake—and I was excited. I haven’t been buying myself much in the way of desserts or treats throughout my pregnancy so far, so it was nice to indulge in not just one, but two pieces of cake at the party, and since we had leftovers, I could have more!
Over the next few days, I had a piece of cake each day. But, each time I did, I noticed my internal dialogue was making me feel guilty for not just eating it, but wanting it, too. The odd time I did walk away from the fridge without a piece in hand didn’t last long. I would go back later to get one...and I would beat myself up over it.
So much of my energy went towards fighting the guilt I felt for eating each piece of cake. I felt guilty because it wasn’t a healthy choice for myself or my baby. I felt like a bad mom...already.
Then I remembered a story about two wolves I heard a while back. It went something like this:
An old Cherokee Indian chief was teaching his grandson about life.
“A fight is going on inside me,” he told the young boy, “a fight between two wolves. One is evil, full of anger, sorrow, regret, greed, self-pity and false pride. The other is good, full of joy, peace, love, humility, kindness and faith.”
“This same fight is going on inside of you, grandson…and inside of every other person on the face of this earth.”
The grandson ponders this for a moment and then asks, “Grandfather, which wolf will win?”
The old man smiled and simply said, “The one you feed.”
—Reverend Billy Graham
Though my story about eating cake is a simple one, it reminded me that we give our thoughts power. I can feed the bad wolf by calling myself a bad mom for eating cake and living in guilt or I can feed the good wolf by showing myself compassion and love instead. Plus, dark chocolate isn’t that bad for you, right? ;)
I choose to feed the good wolf. Which one do you choose?